“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
This is how you find your style.
You desire to be stylish. You desire to own stylish things. So you study stylish people and copy their outfits. You bookmark pages in fashion magazines and create Pinterest boards. You maintain wishlists and save money to acquire more and more of what you desire.
You Get Lost
Along the way you make mistakes. You get swept up in trends. You make purchases you regret. You collect too much stuff. Being stylish begins to feel complicated. You have all these clothes yet nothing to wear. The more you try to look stylish, the more you feel insecure about your style.
You Let Go
So you purge. You take inventory of everything you own and ask yourself: Do I love this? Does it make me feel good to wear it? You throw out everything that no longer fits. You let go of what no longer defines you.
You Find Yourself
You define your style. You curate your wardrobe to reflect your style. If somebody asks you what your style is in three adjectives, you know exactly what to say. You simplify your wardrobe so it is clear to yourself and others what your style really is.
You get older and change in ways you didn’t expect. You no longer feel certain about who you are and what your style is. You feel limited by your perfectly curated wardrobe. If someone asks you to describe your style in three words, you say “no fucking clue” and laugh at how silly that question is, to begin with.
You think fuck it, and throw on whatever outfit you want to wear that day. Sometimes you wear the same thing two days in a row. Sometimes you wear things you would have never worn in the past. You buy clothes that you love, though you don’t try to understand why you love them, you just do.
You Be You
You realize that style is not something you need to achieve. You realize that style is not acquired by building a wardrobe of perfectly curated pieces. You realize that your style is not defined by what you wear or how you dress. You realize that your style is not something you find outside of yourself but something you realize within yourself. You realize that you are your style and that if you just be yourself, then your style will naturally emerge. When you are you, your style feels like an effortless expression of who you are, yet who you are could never fully be defined by your style.